This website is dedicated to the empowerment and abundance of women.


What you were discouraged from doing as a child is what you’re here to do**

This revolutionary concept has dramatically enhanced my life.
It has greatly increased my personal empowerment, especially regarding gender issues.
My experiences are the heart of this website.

So, what was I discouraged from? The biggies were

Sharing a little of my family culture may be useful because it is far from unique. Unspoken and disguised, but underneath everything was an authoritarian system in which only one person in the family was supposed to be recognized or successful. This person was supposed to be male. As for women, we were supposed to be educated, but mainly to support the man and enhance the family’s reputation by window dressing.

In learning new skills I was supposed to work in certain ways. Whenever my father was around, if I tried to find my own way, I was stopped. It wasn’t until I began writing this and tried to describe a specific situation that I realized: “It wasn’t so much that I was supposed to use a certain method; the taboo was on the enjoyment of exploring. This is exactly what my father had wanted to do as a child. Instead, however, since he exhibited too much creativity, he was sent to a military school. My father’s situation may be somewhat extreme, but it illustrates a common parent-child dynamic, in which the parent cannot tolerate the child doing what he(or she) had not been allowed to do. When I recognized this, I became acutely aware that as a parent it was crucial for me to do what I wanted to do, to follow my own path of creativity.

So, as an adult, I have focused on exactly that– finding my own ways, finding what makes my heart sing, and re-parenting myself. The most powerful way to do this has been to COURT my own success.** As we know, the most common use of the word “courting” is in the context of a man wooing a woman. In courting the man does little things that he knows the woman will like (bringing her flowers, taking her out to dinner, etc.) His purpose is to get her to like him, marry him, or get her into bed: By courting the woman the man is courting his own success.

Applied to myself, this has been a transformational concept. I can court my own success, and nourish my heart’s desires. I can pursue the full expression of what I am, in small, manageable steps. It’s a way of telling myself that I am of value, and it gives me energy to take the next step.  I hope that what I share here will give you energy too.


** This is a quote from Ahmayo Bohm, PhD, a Holotropic Breathwork facilitator and developer of the Art of Educare (TM), the art of drawing out what is inherent within a person.
**The concept of courting is also from Ahmayo Bohm.


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Copyright 2015 Carolyn Kahlke